Performed by the author, Christmas 1982
Hello darling, kids O.K.?
It's been a hard ride back.
It's good to see a fire again and
feel the warmth of home.
Will you get my slippers lass?
And fix a jug of ale.
Don't mind the horses now, my boy.
I'll get the men to rub them down,
And clean the tack and oil their hooves.
Some of them are smeared with blood;
You'd think we'd been to war.
Oh - shove my jerkin in the tub,
Add salt to shift the stains.
A messy job we had today -
Killing babies!
Yes, yes, I know. That's what I said -
Killing babies!
Not my idea - don't get me wrong.
I'm paid to do as I am told.
When Herod says you jump, you jump;
And woe betide you if you don't.
Now what you looking like that for?
Thought you'd be glad to see me back.
So hurry with those slippers lass,
And fix that jug of ale.
It all began some days ago -
On Thursday of last week.
These shabby-looking travellers
Came riding into town.
Not the usual sort, mind you,
The sort you bought your bracelet from
Down the market, haggle and sell:
Here today and gone tomorrow.
These were ‘intellectual’,
Carrying books, and charts and maps;
Wanted to see the king, they said,
I ask you - see the king?
Ezra was on guard that night.
You know, the lad from Jericho.
And I was up in the duty room
With a Roman legionnaire.
"Ben" he yelled, "Hey Ben come 'ere
And check these fellers out.
They say they've come from China
And want to see the king!"
We questioned them and checked their gear.
We treated them quite well.
We knew they were important from
The gifts they'd brought along;
That gold and frankincense and myrrh -
It must have cost a bomb!
I could just see Herod's bulging eyes,
That greedy, filthy swine;
"How nice to see you, come on in,
And make yourselves at home".
I took them to the king next day;
You should have seen his face.
For having said their pleasantries
And given him a book,
They started on a rigamarole of stars
and signs and kings.
At first I thought it was a joke;
But Herod didn't laugh.
No more did they. I never saw
Such earnest conversation.
"A King", they said, "A King, we know,
Is born about these parts -
We've read it and your scriptures;
We've proved it from our charts.
Up there, low in the sky - a star
(It's covered now with clouds),
But after dark you'll see again
The sign that led us here.
We've come to pay him homage
For such a child as this
Is destined, as we see it,
To be ruler of the world.
Where is he now? Come let us in.
We will not keep you long.
The nurse, she will be busy;
A moment - and we're gone."
Confusion ran around the court;
I felt my blood run cold.
Uneasy silence filled the air.
Then slowly to his feet he rose,
"Go - find my scribe, and get the priest,
And make them bring their books
And manuscripts - the lot", he said.
"Then read and study till you find
Corroborating evidence
To prove these men are serious
Or else I'll have their blood
And yours - as well.
How could you miss
The truth - if there it's writ -
That God would send a king
Who would be ruler of the world;
And I not know it - Me, the king,
The father of the child?
Go ask amongst the concubines.
Is there something I have missed?"
To cut the story short,
I'll tell you what they found;
That Malachi the prophet
Had said it all along -
In Bethlehem of Judah
A ruler would be born,
A shepherd of the people,
The King of Israel.
"That figures now - for Bethlehem
Is where the star will rise,
At six o'clock tonight, we're sure
Into the southern skies”.
So that was it - the truth was out.
The travellers were thrilled.
"Oh, be my guest", said Herod,
"Anytime you care to call".
Now that sly fox - just mark my word -
Has never missed a trick;
And quick as lightning hatched a plan
To sort the matter out.
"Go, find this long-awaited King.
Please give Him my regards.
Then, Ben, here - good lad - knows the way,
Can bring me back the word
Of what you've found. Then I can come
And join the party too".
I caught his nod, I knew the drill,
I'd seen it all before.
A smile, a kiss, a present,
Then treachery and death.
But plans don't always go the way
You first intend them to.
For even though we watched those men -
The travellers with their star -
With eyes like hawks, they somehow slipped
Our tight security.
I don't mind telling you, my lass,
It nearly cost my life!
But when we told it to the king
Boy - he was mad! I've seldom seen
Him burn with such a livid hate
As boiled up within his soul.
"I want Him dead - that infant King
I will not have him rival me.
So since you don't know which He is,
With my permission, kill the lot:
All babies up to two years old,
And this time do not let me down".
Dear Lord, I didn't join the guard for this.
These are our kids - our nation's future men.
To guard the palace, fight the Romans - yes!
But, killing babies - why?
O why Lord, why?
We hated it, but Ezra said
"We've got a job to do.
And these are sad and violent days
And human flesh is cheap.
It's them or us. As plain as that.
We're simply here to serve.
So pull yourself together Ben;
Let's get it quickly done.
I never saw such agony in any mother's eyes,
The men who wept for mercy as we slew
their little mites.
And all the cries of all the children seemed
to rise and say
"We only came to love you, and you take
our lives away."
We are degraded people;
We never seem to learn.
For generations yet to come
We'll make the children burn.
And though their bloated bellies
May disturb us while we pray,
They only live a little while
And then they go away.
Well, when we'd finished it was nearly dark
And, feeling thirsty, stopped to have a drink.
But fearing vengeance rode a few miles out,
To find an inn along the Egypt road.
Now while the men were settling for the night,
I took a walk to clear my throbbing head,
And saw within the moonlight by the trees
A couple, with a donkey, sneaking by.
"Come here", I said "It's rather late,
Why aren't you home in bed?"
They both looked rather nervous;
My suspicions were aroused.
And then I saw the pannier!
Before I looked, I knew.
I only had a dagger;
I had a job to do.
There, hidden, wrapped in linen,
Was a baby - newly born.
A refugee from Bethlehem,
It wouldn't see the dawn.
The fellow - he was petrified;
The woman she was choked.
I didn't care. I'd got the hang
Of killing babies.
But even as I laid my knife
Against the baby's neck,
He opened wide his little eyes
Like deep, eternal pools of love;
And in the moonlight clear I felt
A quality of childlike trust.
And then he smiled and seemed to say,
"My hour is not yet come".
And - "Lord forgive this soldier
For all the sin he's done".
AFTERTHOUGHT
I'm a soldier, I'm a man,
I'm a rich industrialist;
A modern politician,
A food economist;
A Harley Street physician,
A gynaecologist;
Will I never learn the lesson?
Will I ever yet desist
From
Killing babies?
End of play
[ See also, The Shepherd's Tale | The Innkeepers Story | The Soldier's Story]